I am surprised how this production still lingers on my mind. The story, back then, struck me as unconvincing: a dashing Italian army officer (Giorgio – played by David Thaxton) falls in love with a diminutive, sickly and unattractive woman who dies at the end of the play (Fosca – played by Elena Roger), despite the fact that he has a very beautiful and voluptuous, albeit already married, lover (Clara – played by Sarlett Strallen).
Is this what you call love?
Smothering pursuit of me.
You think that this is love?
I’m sorry that you’re lonely,
I’m sorry that you want me as you do.
I’m sorry that I fail to feel
The way you want me to feel.
I’m sorry that you’re ill,
I’m sorry you’re in pain.
I’m sorry that you aren’t beautiful.
But yes, I wish you’d go away
And leave me alone!
Everywhere I turn, there you are
This is not love
Just some kind of obsession.
Will you never learn when too far is too far,
Have you no concern
For what I want, what I feel?
(pointing at Clara’s letter)
Love is what you earn and return
When you care for another
So much that the other’s set free.
Don’t you see?
Can’t you understand?
Love’s not a constant demand,
It’s a gift you bestow
Love isn’t sudden surrender
It’s tender and slow, it must grow.
Yet everywhere I go,
You appear or I know you are near
This is not love just a need for possession.
Call it what you will
This is not love, this is a reverse
Like a curse, something out of control
I’ve begun to fear
For my soul…
How could you? How dare you follow me?
You needn’t speak to me. You could pretend that I’m not even here.
I am sick, don’t you understand?
I understand all too well. I could attend to you.
I could help you get better.
I don’t want you to help. You’re the reason I’m sick.
I apologize. Nothing could be further from what I
wanted for you. That is why I want to follow you to Milan.
To see that you are well.
Fosca, you can’t do this.
I heard what you said, Giorgio. I’ve come to tell you that
I will keep my distance. I will stay out of your path. But
I can be nearby, I can be quietly watching.
And you think that this will make me love you?
No, no. I am doing this because I love you.
My heart feels nothing for you.
How many times do you have to hear this?
This has nothing to do with your heart. This has
to do with your eyes. What you see. If I were
beautiful. If I were warm and soft to your touch –
you would feel otherwise.
No. Your appearance is no excuse for the way you behave.
My feelings towards you are because of your relentlessness,
your constant selfishness and insensitivity.
I’m sorry. No one has ever told me how to love. I know I
feel too much, Giorgio. I often don’t know what to do
with my feelings. You understand that, don’t you?
It seems to me the answer rests with you.
Yes, I have obligations at home, Giorgio,
but my heart is yours. When my son is older,
when he goes off to school, there is the
chance for us to be together. I will make
the sacrifice you ask of me then. Please
understand why I can’t now. Will you wait
for me, Giorgio? I have to know. We both
have to know.
You think that this is love?
Love isn’t so convenient.
Love isn’t something scheduled in advance,
Not something guaranteed you need
For fear it may pass you by.
You have to take a chance,
You can’t just try it out.
What’s love unless it’s unconditional?
Love doesn’t give a damn about tomorrow
And neither do I!
‘What’s love unless it’s unconditional // Love doesn’t give a damn about tomorrow’ — wow. Fosca’s foolish and headlong love for Giorgio has changed the man. In comparison, Clara now seems inferior and dull. Giorgio proclaims his love for Fosca in the following:
No one has ever loved me
As deeply as you.
No one has truly shown me
What love could be like until now:
Not pretty or safe or easy
But more than I ever knew.
Love within reason –
That isn’t love.
And I’ve learned that from you…
Are you cold?
No, I’m afraid.
All this happiness,
Coming when there’s so little time.
Too much happiness
More than I can bear.
I pray for the strength to enjoy it.
You’ll leave tomorrow.
This is the only time we have.
You do love me, don’t you?
Yes, I love you.
Say it again.
I love you.
When I was watching the musical, I thought Giorgio’s change of heart — from hating the ugly Fosca to loving her — was too quick. But after mulling the musical over for three months, I see that the first scene between Clara and Giorgio (I must add that they make the most exquisite and suggestive love on stage and better still, the act is accomplished without any vulgarity) already foreshadows what will happen between Giorgio and Fosca:
Then inevitable, yes,
But I confess it was the look
The sadness in your eyes
That day when we glanced at each other
In the park.
We were both unhappy.
Unhappiness can be seductive.
You pitied me…
How quickly pity leads to love.